Spy Kids 3-D: Game Over (2003)

This movie is bad (ugly visuals, incomprehensible plot, bland lead character–sorry, Juni) so I’m just going to use this review to describe in full its one great moment. Sexy scientist Antonio Benderas is hard at work in his lab and declares that “nothing is more important” than his current project, but when he hears that his kids are in trouble, he dramatically destroys it, flies off in his rocket boots, and lands superhero-style on the street with “DAD” emblazoned on the screen. Dad goals.

2

Spy Kids 2: The Island of Lost Dreams (2002)

Loses lots of the first’s cheesy kid-dreamy charm, thanks to an overload of the spy kids schtick (there’s a whole department now?) and the SFX that go with it (so much green screen). New plot lines and characters are thrown in just because (see Donnagon, the in-laws). It’s a mess, occasionally in an entertaining way (see Romero–“Do you think God stays in heaven because he too is afraid of what he created?”–arriving with his giant animal hybrids at the same time as the President’s flying hummer).

3

Spy Kids (2001)

An entertaining mix of cheesy, kid-hearted espionage action (gadgets galore, plus an imaginative villain, lair, and evil plan), family movie silliness (“Oh shiii-take mushrooms”, plus “My parents can’t be spies! They’re not cool enough!”), and new-millenium charisma (they’re actually very cool–see the sexy origin story at the beginning). The family relationship arc is also well done (“Spy work, that’s easy. Keeping a family together, that’s difficult. And that’s the mission worth fighting for”).

6